Exploring the Insights #2

Insight 2: I Have Parts – May I be open to the idea that they have differing needs and perspectives

The IFS model recognizes that our psyches or personalities are comprised of an “internal family” of different parts, sometimes called subpersonalities or ego states. Like a family member, each part has its own opinions, attitudes, thoughts, feelings, memories, points of view, beliefs, motives, assumptions, and perspectives about the world. For example, a part of you may suddenly want to binge-watch a series on Netflix. A different part may think, “You haven’t cleaned the house yet!” Another part says, “It’s a bad idea to start watching Netflix; You know what will happen.” Another part may angrily shout, “Don’t turn on that TV!!” Finally, a voice in your head may declare, “I don’t care, I’m watching my show!” Which part is the real you? Why, all of them! You are a whirlwind of thoughts, emotions, and behaviors!

According to Richard Schwartz our parts have motivations for everything they do, even if we are unaware of those reasons, in an effort to keep us feeling safe and secure. He claims that every part has a positive intent for us, no matter how problematic its behavior seems. With this insight, we gain clarity about parts of ourselves and begin to recognize that they are doing their best. Nothing is pathologizing about having parts. It is normal.

As we accept that we have parts, we can also see that they have differing perspectives. There are three categories of parts: managers, firefighters, and exiles, each playing a different role. Some Managers work to help us present ourselves as capable in the world. They keep us on time, monitor our diet, and pick up birthday cards for our family members. They help us manage our day-to-day life. We see these parts as proactive.

Other parts, called Exiles, are wounded, typically in early childhood. These parts of us long to have their stories told and their pain taken away. The parts are often burdened with feelings such as shame, rage, or terror, and beliefs such as they are unworthy or unlovable.

Firefighters are on the lookout for the pain of the Exiles. These parts are reactionary, and if the pain threatens to flood the system, they will do whatever it takes to stop or numb the feelings of distress. These parts often cause us to act in ways that are not seen as socially acceptable or in ways that our other parts don't like, such as drinking too much, cutting, gambling, or overeating.

Through the Internal Family Systems Model, we can get to know our parts, develop relationships with them, and ultimately help them heal. At PATH our aim is to provide a safe space where you can begin the work of getting to know your parts and speak for their emotions, intentions and fears while the community holds space to witness them and share self energy in support of your journey. Connection is an important aspect of recovery and we look forward to seeing you soon at any one of our weekly meetings.

Fresh Face for PATH Website

With a spirit of creativity and clarity, PATH has updated the look and feel of its website to streamline the layout and navigation, improve accessibility, and add a bit of playfulness to the imagery. We also plan to add some additional features in the coming months like an archive for the newsletter. Please take a moment to explore www.path2recovery.org and share any feedback or suggestions with us via email at: pathtorecovery365@gmail.com.

PATH programs are funded by the generous contributions of our members and communities and we appreciate your support. Please make a donation today at whatever level you are able:https://gofund.me/c248afb4​

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